I suspect foul play

Princess Buttercup (AKA: Brittney the "big breasted chicken")

April 2006 - July 2009

The Heavens seem to be calling quite a few home...
The King of Pop, Farrah and now Princess Buttercup. I guess even in Heaven there needs to be poultry. Why not? But for us, it was a hugemungous shock! Buttercup was our "prized bird". She was healthy. She layed regularly. Her feathers were as healthy and shiny as a new penny! Just yesterday she played in the yard while we tilled her up some dirt to cool off in. But there was a mysterious moment when she came dashing across the yard yelping! We all just looked at each other. Well, today we found her face down. Very sad indeed. Bailey cried. Nate buried her under the boy's window. Very touching.
In an effort to figure out what might have gone wrong I searched the Internet doctor. It was quite astonishing what I found. Who would have thunk that "chicken death" was such a HOT topic? After all, don't we eat chicken more frequently than we consider them pets around these parts? I just thought I was strange for liking them more than my own brothers.

After typing in "chicken death" in google this is what I found...
I give you my favorites:

#1) "Ok, so I have a flock of Buffs with 2 (well 1 now) roosters. They are about 15 weeks old. They're happy, well-fed, and seem healthy, even this one I'm telling you about. The wife went out to feed them today, and all were fine, when she turned around one of the roosters was laying on the ground deader than a doornail. I went out, no wounds, no indication of blood anywhere (I checked well), no foam at the mouth that may have indicated choking (no jokes please.). Any idea what I'm looking at here? Not really into performing autopsies, but would like to know what would make a chicken drop dead instantly."

Now let it be known that there was a whole page of serious comments from concerned chicken owners who responded with grievances and concern over this owner's loss. And I would have loved to add my woe but if I might point out one thing that held me back... "the wife" part of that little clipping disturbed me some. What the heck red neck says "the wife went out..." C'mon! And then POOF! Just like that "the wife" turned around and the rooster dies? "deader than a doornail". Very nicely put, I think.

#2) "I've had 2 hens for a year now. 1 Rhode island red and 1 black australorp. Yesterday the Australorp just died. No warning. No signs of foul play. Not a ruffled feather. They free range in the daytime when I'm home and I went out early evening and she was just lying in a sandy spot, dead. She'd layed an egg in the morning, did her usual clucking and running around the yard when I let her into the yard late in the morning...Any advice on introducing a new hen to our remaining RI Red? She seems SO lonely without her lifelong companion."

but that isn't even the best part... The best part was the response this owner got...

A.) "Eureka,What state are you in? Some states will do a free necropsy for backyard flocks. If I were you, I'd take a fecal sample in to the vet for a float to see if your flock has worms. Did you notice anything strange about the two who died? Stumbling, depression, weight loss, anything?"

Ummm.. a "free necropsy"? What the???!!! Better yet, "I'd take a fecal sample in to the vet for a float..." I don't think so! Bury the darn bird and let her R.I.P! She done her duty! I loved Buttercup, but I till her fecal samples into my garden... I don't pick them up and study them.

Did you know Chickens stumble, get depressed and have weight fluctuation? It's like we're talking about grandma!

But my personal favorite was definitely this:

#3) "you can do a home autopsy, I have done this for a number of my birds and it helps give me a narrower range of things to read up on (usually) there is a link here - this site gives you step by step instructions and also a list of possibilities based on your findings at the end. It can be hard to do on a bird that's been well loved but it can really help with either reassurance or information (or both)"

That is just wrong! So I just have to know what you think... When these folks were buying a house Did they have as a part of their criteria: "3 bedroom, 2 bath and office with an autopsy suite off to the side for the chickens"? Does it make you wonder if they also neuter their own hound dog and felines?

And last but certainly not least, there is a place in cyberspace for 'Chicken obituaries".

#4)" Chicken Obituaries
June 23, 2009
Such a tragic event happened today. “A date that will live in infamy”. Our first chicken died, it was poor California, such a sweet great little chicken. It died of natural causes underneath the hanging food bowl. These are the types of events that make you ask the Question,” are there chickens in heaven”?"

I would be lying if I said that I was NOT sad that Buttercup died today. Deader than a doornail! She really was one of my favorites. I baby these beauties. But you won't find me with a scalpel performing chicken autopsies or gathering fecal samples to cart into the vet. None of that will change her escape from the heat of summer for free range grazing time in the heavens. That being said, you are more than welcome to consider this as a chicken obituary! And to answer #4, I do believe there are chickens in heaven...

I hate the smell of ketchup...

Some things just stink... Like the obvious; dog food, ponds in the hot summer, and old yard clippings that have sat in the green barrels for too long. In years past while experiencing pregnancy, I really thought that the smell of meat cooking (let alone the taste~ YUCK!) would do me in. And little sweaty boys belong in a shower for rinsing and then a bubble bath for aromatic tolerance purposes. But my story really isn't about that...

Last night while I was enjoying some good R.E.M. sleep (after all it was 12:35 a.m.) I was startled by my very own door bell... ringing away! Never thinking clearly at such an hour, I peeped at my clock and then urgently ran to my front door... whizzed it open... and was winded by the smell of ketchup. The midnight Ketchup ghost visited my house. And clearly I was chosen for a funny prank on a Thursday late night. (who does pranks on Thursday night? Seriously...)

In my delirium, I was unable to identify the connection between my door bell ringing and the stench of ketchup. In fact, I didn't even think about the rest of the night! I was too busy searching for Mckay's b.b. gun and peepen' out my window...

Around 1:10 a.m. I witnessed some seriously funny humor... The young ladies (light use of word) 3 houses down, (to the north of mine) tip-toes across their front lawn (giggling) in the street light (ssooooo sneaky) towards their next victim! The funniest thing I saw all night was one of them do the "pee dance"! She even tried to hold it in with her hand! (Which is fine if your all alone!) After all, doesn't everyone suddenly have to urinate as soon as you begin a good game of hide and seek! It almost made me have to go myself! The more athletic of the two crawled towards the neighbors door and stretched her little pointer out... and I believe that I was laughing out loud when she and her mischievous friend took off running towards their hide out. Their hair was waggen', their legs moving as fast as they could go... (it was obviously the most exercise they had gotten since their last prank) and I began to remember years ago enjoying a good laugh at the expense of somebody else's sleep. And for some sick reason, I began enjoying what I saw!

This morning, however, little Coley stepped outside to enjoy some fresh air when he realized that he was standing in ketchup. A whole puddle on my door step... to go along with the spots all down my walk way making it seem as though somebody were profusely bleeding to death all the way to the road. Gross! And I guess if my olfactory nerve were on sabbatical then I might have actually thought that somebody did have a silent injury in my door way just before they ran off! But unfortunately, Cole and I had to smell the leftover fumes of hours old ketchup when we opened up the door. And it wasn't easy to clean up!

So tonight, in honor of my freshly scrubbed, clean walk way and front porch, I'm inviting the lovely ladies 3 houses down to the north of mine to come to and celebrate. We are having hot dogs (which they can bring because I hate hot dogs... though my children love them~ because they've never barfed one up) and I'll be providing the ketchup... since they are undoubtedly out at their house.

Come by if you'd like!