I had a friend (or two) comment on their disgust about my revealing only perfection on the blog... and like I said before, my life is made up of peaches and cream and so there isn't much more to write about than that. But if there were, I would surely divulge all of my faults to the Internet world, completely focus all of my energy on all the negative aspects that life has to offer and make myself out to be a FOOL... and then beg for anyone and everyone to dis-respect me for being a total LOSER! But like I said... that isn't the case. So since I live in Utopia I'd like to share a little fairy tale of my own... as to never forget it myself... because it makes me feel soooo warm and fuzzy!

After my {practically perfect in every way} husband came to the realization that I spent a large hunk of his hard earned bazillions visiting my favorite aesthatician every month, he became quite curious. After all, he is married to the princess of his dreams and he couldn't make sense of such an expenditure. [I don't have morning breath or body odor. I fit into size 2 jeans (If you put them over my head with my arms in the leg holes) but I only wear dresses anyway and I sing love songs in my beautiful voice all day while exotic birds flutter around me doing my house work. And let us not forget that I look like a movie star first thing in the morning. But its my inner beauty that really crowns me.]

Where was I?... Oh yes. Husb wondering why? So I told him my most lovely sob story about how my thyroid is wacked out and as a direct result I'm growing a mustache ( never mind that the hair on my head is falling out in chunks and that I only shave my legs like twice a year... and that is because I want to use my yummy smelling peach shave gel) and I couldn't bare for him to see that my 5:00 mustache shadow gives his a run for his money. So I've bonded with the wax lady over at Habit Hair salon. And with that, he tripped over himself for a solution and then went out and bought me a little gift to cure my woes...

In introduce you to my very own Satin Smooth wax machine. I named her Darline (because it only makes sense that I will be looking darling with a smooth lip and perfect brows.) She will be bringing me hours of enjoyment coupled by amusement and entertainment for all... and with that, I give you my new lip!
First thing first... Although you may think that I am sporting herpes on my lower lip, I would love for you to know that I am completely un-contagious! and second... I strongly recommend reading instructions before using the ever innocent looking wax machine. And third... I want it on the record that I do not have hair growing out of my lip... it was an aimless mistake that caused dreadful pain!
I've tried to recall my princess self applying the wax (in it true honey form) to my facial region in an effort to figure out how I ended up with it on my lip. But after I ripped the first strip off, I was unable to remember... well... anything!
So I've come to the conclusion that when I spilled a little drop from my application stick onto my lip and then applied the little material strip, I might have been a little more cautious to avoid letting the two match up. And further, a quick rip does not diminish the amount of pain which plunges through the entire facial region ~ as if you just lay your lips under the back tire of your peeling out jeep.
And one more note of caution... I do not anticipate using Darline ever again... so if you're interested, you may find her gently used on e-bay next to the picture of me and my augmented Angelina Jolie lips... shipping is free.